Two word story

[Mudfly]

Hi everyone!

Just thought I would start a Banner Saga two word story!
Seems all game related forums have at least one of these, so I thought we should have one too.

Let’s try to have the story make some sense and be at least slightly grammatically correct... or not... i guess it’s all up to you :D

OK! I guess i will start things of then!

As the

[Ratatoskr]

village slept

[Hannath]

dark deeds

[CottonWolf]

were planned

[opifex]

by bandits

[stelly]

good intentions

[belamoor]

ruthless methods

[kincajou]

involving fire

[TheBobWiley]

silent footsteps

[jojo]

sharp knives

[Jarko]

death ensued.

[kincajou]

Dawn Approached

[Mudfly]

But the



(random text to let me post)

[Arnie]

Wiley Varl

[Sales101]

Slashed away

[Troll]

The mighty

[mrboo001]

Cheif of

(random random)

[Arnie]

the haughty

[lamaz]

and obscene

[Ratatoskr]

but distinguished

[Troll]

Red carpet

[TheBobWiley]

dapper clan

(had to say it)

[Mudfly]

, laughing as

[Jarko]

he jumped...

[jezzarisky]

headlong into

[kincajou]

mighty dreams

[Mudfly]

about liquorice.

[belamoor]

which ... he ...

[Troll]

Bathed into

[mcloud357]

for zardoz

[Mudfly]

. The villagers

[opifex]

profoundly upset

[Mudfly]

By the

(Random Random)

[Kimberly]

defenestration of

[CottonWolf]

already blind

[Troll]

Wooden legged

[Kimberly]

Petey Pirrrrate

[Troll]

Who thennnnn

[kincajou]

Grew wings

[Kimberly]

and promptly

[Mudfly]

The story so far...

As the village slept dark deeds were planned by bandits good intentions ruthless methods involving fire silent footsteps sharp knives death ensued.
Dawn Approached But the Wiley Varl Slashed away The mighty Cheif of the haughty and obscene but distinguished Red carpet dapper clan, laughing as he jumped... headlong into mighty dreams about liquorice. which ... he ... Bathed into for zardoz.
The villagers profoundly upset By the defenestration of already blind Wooden legged Petey Pirrrrate Who thennnnn Grew wings and promptly Escaped prison

[Ratatoskr]

Man we really need some punctuation there. But anyway:

but discovered

[Kimberly]

With punctuation:

As the village slept, dark deeds were planned by bandits. Good intentions, ruthless methods involving fire, silent footsteps, sharp knives...death ensued. Dawn approached, but the wily varl slashed away the mighty chief of the haughty and obscene--but distinguished--Red Carpet Dapper clan, laughing as he jumped headlong into mighty dreams about liquorice, which he bathed into for Zardoz.

The villagers, profoundly upset by the defenestration of already blind wooden-legged Petey Pirrrate who thennnn grew wings and promptly escaped prison but discovered that he

[Mudfly]

Was the

(Thanks for fixing the grammar and all that Kimberly!)

[mrboo001]

son of

random random

[Troll]

Red beard's

(And I was just thinking we needed a recap. We need to continue the story until the release of TBS and publish it)

[opifex]

second cousin

[Kimberly]

, and thus

[kincajou]

it all

random random

[Kimberly]

came tumbling

[mrboo001]

down, straight

[CottonWolf]

into the

(Apparently messages now have to be at least 100 characters?)

[Troll]

Well's dirty

[Kimberly]

water. Sadly

[opifex]

not the

(this message is totally more than 10 characters long...)

[Mudfly]

Good kind,

[Troll]

But the
(10char)

[Kimberly]

pestilent kind.

[CottonWolf]

Fetid liquid

[Kimberly]

teeming with

[Troll]

sicly rodents

[kincajou]

, oryx skulls

[Troll]

and numerous

[Mudfly]

bloated toads.

[Mudfly]

(This is probably a horrible thing to do, but since no one posted in i while i will double post...)

Petey then

[kincajou]

loudly growled

(i'm restraining myselft to allow at least two posts between each of mine :P )

[Mudfly]

and said -"

[CottonWolf]

Arrrrrrrrrrrrrr m'hearties,

[Troll]

it hurtssss.
(doesn"t it count as 3 words CottonWolf
?)

[CottonWolf]

." He felt
(I don't know. I reasoned that contractions are probably one word rather than two. Like they're and it's... *shrug*)

[mrboo001]

melancholy over

[Troll]

and again".

[Kimberly]

So far:

As the village slept, dark deeds were planned by bandits. Good intentions, ruthless methods involving fire, silent footsteps, sharp knives...death ensued. Dawn approached, but the wily varl slashed away the mighty chief of the haughty and obscene--but distinguished--Red Carpet Dapper clan, laughing as he jumped headlong into mighty dreams about liquorice, which he bathed into for Zardoz.

The villagers, profoundly upset by the defenestration of already blind wooden-legged Petey Pirrrate who thennnn grew wings and promptly escaped prison but discovered that he was the son of Red Beard's second cousin, and thus it all came tumbling down, straight into the well's dirty water. Sadly not the good kind, but the pestilent kind: fetid liquid teeming with sickly rodents, oryx skulls and numerous bloated toads.

Petey then loudly growled and said: "Arrrrrrrrrrrrrr m'hearties, it hurtssss." He felt melancholy over and again. The gods

[kincajou]

responded promptly

[mrboo001]

to Petey's

[Troll]

dark soul,"

[Jarko]

"Your hatred

[Eberict]

must tame

[Kimberly]

Edit: Eberict got there before me, so disregard this. :p

shames the

[Troll]

the violent

[CottonWolf]

North winds,

[Troll]

icy plains

[Mudfly]

full of

[kincajou]

green goats

[Mudfly]

Will not

[Troll]

save you.

[Kimberly]

The gale

[kincajou]

will crush

[Guðmundr]

the village

[Eberict]

Until finally

[Troll]

the winds

[Kimberly]

subside. Fear

[Troll]

the consequences

(should you not heed our words" would fit well to close this "")

[kincajou]

unless you

[Eberict]

act wisely

[Guðmundr]

." Petey replied,

[Troll]

boisterously and

[Mudfly]

with great

[Guðmundr]

eloquence, "Me

[Troll]

ain't gunna

[Kimberly]

do nuthin'

[Mudfly]

'bout that

[Jarko]

, so yous'

[Mudfly]

Hatin be

[Ratatoskr]

pointless, yo

[balnoisi]

". belly-dancing beauties

[CottonWolf]

descended from

[Troll]

So far:

As the village slept, dark deeds were planned by bandits. Good intentions, ruthless methods involving fire, silent footsteps, sharp knives...death ensued. Dawn approached, but the wily varl slashed away the mighty chief of the haughty and obscene--but distinguished--Red Carpet Dapper clan, laughing as he jumped headlong into mighty dreams about liquorice, which he bathed into for Zardoz.

The villagers, profoundly upset by the defenestration of already blind wooden-legged Petey Pirrrate who thennnn grew wings and promptly escaped prison but discovered that he was the son of Red Beard's second cousin, and thus it all came tumbling down, straight into the well's dirty water. Sadly not the good kind, but the pestilent kind: fetid liquid teeming with sickly rodents, oryx skulls and numerous bloated toads.

Petey then loudly growled and said: "Arrrrrrrrrrrrrr m'hearties, it hurtssss." He felt melancholy over and again. The gods responded promptly to Petey's dark soul,"Your hatred must tame the violent north winds, full of green goats will not save you. The gale will crush the village, until finally the winds subside.
Fear the consequences unless you act wisely. Petey replied, boisterously and with great eloquence, "Me ain't gunna do nuthin' 'bout that , so yous' Hatin be pointless, yo".

Belly-dancing beauties descended from

[Troll]

the stormy

[Eberict]

creche of

[Kaffo]

interstellar infants.

[stelly]

Big Afro

[mrboo001]

Joseph sighed,"

[kincajou]

Aw Man!

[Troll]

Da hell

[Mudfly]

with this!

[mrboo001]

" As he

[Troll]

spouted those

[mrboo001]

grey trolls.

[kincajou]

Suddenly there

[CottonWolf]

was a

[Troll]

heavy rain

[Mudfly]

falling from

[kincajou]

the ground

[Mudfly]

up. -"WHAT

[mrboo001]

! RAIN

fdas

[Mudfly]

? WHY

(there's a filter against all caps? :D )

[CottonWolf]

?' he opined

[Troll]

, his eyes

[Ettanin]

(deleted)

[mrboo001]

aimed at

[kincajou]

the sky

[Troll]

the skies

DISREGARD. same words at the same time. Now that's what I call coincidence.

[Mudfly]

-" Have the

[Troll]

ancestors forsaken

[mrboo001]

us? Why

[Mudfly]

do they

[Guðmundr]

let the

[Troll]

wrath of

[Guðmundr]

So far:

As the village slept, dark deeds were planned by bandits. Good intentions, ruthless methods involving fire, silent footsteps, sharp knives...death ensued. Dawn approached, but the wily varl slashed away the mighty chief of the haughty and obscene--but distinguished--Red Carpet Dapper clan, laughing as he jumped headlong into mighty dreams about liquorice, which he bathed into for Zardoz.

The villagers, profoundly upset by the defenestration of already blind wooden-legged Petey Pirrrate who thennnn grew wings and promptly escaped prison but discovered that he was the son of Red Beard's second cousin, and thus it all came tumbling down, straight into the well's dirty water. Sadly not the good kind, but the pestilent kind: fetid liquid teeming with sickly rodents, oryx skulls and numerous bloated toads.

Petey then loudly growled and said: "Arrrrrrrrrrrrrr m'hearties, it hurtssss." He felt melancholy over and again. The gods responded promptly to Petey's dark soul,"Your hatred must tame the violent north winds, icy plains full of green goats will not save you. The gale will crush the village, until finally the winds subside.
Fear the consequences unless you act wisely. Petey replied, boisterously and with great eloquence, "Me ain't gunna do nuthin' 'bout that , so yous' Hatin be pointless, yo".

Belly-dancing beauties descended from the stormy creche of interstellar infants. Big Afro Joseph sighed, "Aw man! Da hell with this!" As he spouted those grey trolls. Suddenly there was a heavy rain falling from the ground up. "WHAT! RAIN? WHY?" He opined, his eyes aimed at the sky. "Have the ancestors forsaken us? Why do they let the wrath of Petey Pirrrate

[Kaffo]

punish me?"

[Mudfly]

. Joseph fell

[Guðmundr]

over and

[mrboo001]

landed on

[Troll]

the wet

[Mudfly]

Grass. His

[Guðmundr]

head was

[Mudfly]

Hammering. -"Who

[mrboo001]

would do

[Guðmundr]

such a

[Rhian]

maleficent deed

[Guðmundr]

? Only the

[Ratatoskr]

wind answered

[Troll]

:"In your

[CottonWolf]

mind, kiddo

[Repoman]

. In your

[Guðmundr]

mind." Unfortunately,

[mrboo001]

Joseph wasn't

[Mudfly]

ready to

[kincajou]

believe whispers

[Troll]

by treacherous

[Mudfly]

air spirits

[Guðmundr]

So far:

As the village slept, dark deeds were planned by bandits. Good intentions, ruthless methods involving fire, silent footsteps, sharp knives...death ensued. Dawn approached, but the wily varl slashed away the mighty chief of the haughty and obscene--but distinguished--Red Carpet Dapper clan, laughing as he jumped headlong into mighty dreams about liquorice, which he bathed into for Zardoz.

The villagers, profoundly upset by the defenestration of already blind wooden-legged Petey Pirrrate who thennnn grew wings and promptly escaped prison but discovered that he was the son of Red Beard's second cousin, and thus it all came tumbling down, straight into the well's dirty water. Sadly not the good kind, but the pestilent kind: fetid liquid teeming with sickly rodents, oryx skulls and numerous bloated toads.

Petey then loudly growled and said: "Arrrrrrrrrrrrrr m'hearties, it hurtssss." He felt melancholy over and again. The gods responded promptly to Petey's dark soul,"Your hatred must tame the violent north winds, icy plains full of green goats will not save you. The gale will crush the village, until finally the winds subside.
Fear the consequences unless you act wisely. Petey replied, boisterously and with great eloquence, "Me ain't gunna do nuthin' 'bout that , so yous' Hatin be pointless, yo".

Belly-dancing beauties descended from the stormy creche of interstellar infants. Big Afro Joseph sighed, "Aw man! Da hell with this!" As he spouted those grey trolls. Suddenly there was a heavy rain falling from the ground up. "WHAT! RAIN? WHY?" He opined, his eyes aimed at the sky. "Have the ancestors forsaken us? Why do they let the wrath of Petey Pirrrate punish me?" Joseph fell over and landed on the wet grass. His head was hammering. "Who would do such a maleficent deed?" Only the wind answered: "In your mind, kiddo. In your mind." Unfortunately, Joseph wasn't ready to believe whispers by treacherous air spirits.

Meanwhile, Vándr
(Vándr means wicked/evil in Old Norse, thought it made a good name. Maybe for a Varl?)

[mrboo001]

simply laughed

[Mudfly]

as she

[Troll]

threw the

[Mudfly]

last of

[Guðmundr]

the puny

[mrboo001]

villagers off

[Ratatoskr]

a cliff

[Guðmundr]

, knowing that

[kincajou]

humans could

[Mudfly]

bring the

[Troll]

earth to

[kincajou]

it's knees

[Ratatoskr]

if they

[Guðmundr]

kept eating

[Troll]

the many

[kincajou]

winged Lemmings.

[Guðmundr]

She was

[mrboo001]

rather pleased

[Mudfly]

knowing that

[kincajou]

it was

[Guðmundr]

the final

[Troll]

fight against

[CottonWolf]

the guardian

[Mudfly]

that would

[DarkWaterSong]

forever set

[mrboo001]

Vándr's course

[Guðmundr]

So far:

As the village slept, dark deeds were planned by bandits. Good intentions, ruthless methods involving fire, silent footsteps, sharp knives. Death ensued. Dawn approached, but the wily varl slashed away the mighty chief of the haughty and obscene--but distinguished--Red Carpet Dapper clan, laughing as he jumped headlong into mighty dreams about liquorice, which he bathed into for Zardoz.

The villagers, profoundly upset by the defenestration of already blind wooden-legged Petey Pirrrate who thennnn grew wings and promptly escaped prison but discovered that he was the son of Red Beard's second cousin, and thus it all came tumbling down, straight into the well's dirty water. Sadly not the good kind, but the pestilent kind: fetid liquid teeming with sickly rodents, oryx skulls and numerous bloated toads.

Petey then loudly growled and said: "Arrrrrrrrrrrrrr m'hearties, it hurtssss." He felt melancholy over and again. The gods responded promptly to Petey's dark soul,"Your hatred must tame the violent north winds, icy plains full of green goats will not save you. The gale will crush the village, until finally the winds subside. Fear the consequences unless you act wisely. Petey replied, boisterously and with great eloquence, "Me ain't gunna do nuthin' 'bout that , so yous' Hatin be pointless, yo".

Belly-dancing beauties descended from the stormy creche of interstellar infants. Big Afro Joseph sighed, "Aw man! Da hell with this!" As he spouted those grey trolls. Suddenly there was a heavy rain falling from the ground up. "WHAT! RAIN? WHY?" He opined, his eyes aimed at the sky. "Have the ancestors forsaken us? Why do they let the wrath of Petey Pirrrate punish me?" Joseph fell over and landed on the wet grass. His head was hammering. "Who would do such a maleficent deed?" Only the wind answered: "In your mind, kiddo. In your mind." Unfortunately, Joseph wasn't ready to believe whispers by treacherous air spirits.

Meanwhile, Vándr only laughed as she threw the last of the puny villagers off a cliff, knowing that humans could bring the earth to it's knees if they kept eating the many winged lemmings. She was rather pleased, knowing that it was the final fight against the gaurdian that would forever set Vándr's course toward the

[Troll]

death of

[Mudfly]

all mortals.

[Guðmundr]

"Petey will

[Troll]

show the

[Ratatoskr]

foolish humans

[Guðmundr]

that he

[kincajou]

truly is

[mrboo001]

above humanity's

[Troll]

poor souls".

[Guðmundr]

She said,

[Rhian]

looking down

[Mudfly]

on the

[Troll]

old little

[kincajou]

lady's remains.

[Guðmundr]

"I, Vándr,

[mrboo001]

will have

[Troll]

the last

[Ratatoskr]

laugh. Truly

[kincajou]

the gods

[Guðmundr]

So far:

As the village slept, dark deeds were planned by bandits. Good intentions, ruthless methods involving fire, silent footsteps, sharp knives. Death ensued. Dawn approached, but the wily varl slashed away the mighty chief of the haughty and obscene--but distinguished--Red Carpet Dapper clan, laughing as he jumped headlong into mighty dreams about liquorice, which he bathed into for Zardoz.

The villagers, profoundly upset by the defenestration of already blind wooden-legged Petey Pirrrate who thennnn grew wings and promptly escaped prison but discovered that he was the son of Red Beard's second cousin, and thus it all came tumbling down, straight into the well's dirty water. Sadly not the good kind, but the pestilent kind: fetid liquid teeming with sickly rodents, oryx skulls and numerous bloated toads.

Petey then loudly growled and said: "Arrrrrrrrrrrrrr m'hearties, it hurtssss." He felt melancholy over and again. The gods responded promptly to Petey's dark soul,"Your hatred must tame the violent north winds, icy plains full of green goats will not save you. The gale will crush the village, until finally the winds subside. Fear the consequences unless you act wisely. Petey replied, boisterously and with great eloquence, "Me ain't gunna do nuthin' 'bout that , so yous' Hatin be pointless, yo".

Belly-dancing beauties descended from the stormy creche of interstellar infants. Big Afro Joseph sighed, "Aw man! Da hell with this!" As he spouted those grey trolls. Suddenly there was a heavy rain falling from the ground up. "WHAT! RAIN? WHY?" He opined, his eyes aimed at the sky. "Have the ancestors forsaken us? Why do they let the wrath of Petey Pirrrate punish me?" Joseph fell over and landed on the wet grass. His head was hammering. "Who would do such a maleficent deed?" Only the wind answered: "In your mind, kiddo. In your mind." Unfortunately, Joseph wasn't ready to believe whispers by treacherous air spirits.

Meanwhile, Vándr only laughed as she threw the last of the puny villagers off a cliff, knowing that humans could bring the earth to it's knees if they kept eating the many winged lemmings. She was rather pleased, knowing that it was the final fight against the gaurdian that would forever set Vándr's course toward the death of all mortals. "Petey will show the foolish humans that he truly is above humanity's poor souls." She said, looking down on the old little lady's remains. "I, Vándr, will have the last laugh. Truly, the gods don't know

[Mudfly]

how to

[Troll]

handle such

[kincajou]

incredible power

[Guðmundr]

." Suddenly, a

[Troll]

surge of

[Mudfly]

enormous power

[Guðmundr]

came from

[kincajou]

the lower

[Ratatoskr]

level of

[Troll]

Manheimr's core

[Guðmundr]

, destroying the

[Mudfly]

veil between

[kincajou]

toon world

[Guðmundr]

So far:

As the village slept, dark deeds were planned by bandits. Good intentions, ruthless methods involving fire, silent footsteps, sharp knives. Death ensued. Dawn approached, but the wily varl slashed away the mighty chief of the haughty and obscene--but distinguished--Red Carpet Dapper clan, laughing as he jumped headlong into mighty dreams about liquorice, which he bathed into for Zardoz.

The villagers, profoundly upset by the defenestration of already blind wooden-legged Petey Pirrrate who thennnn grew wings and promptly escaped prison but discovered that he was the son of Red Beard's second cousin, and thus it all came tumbling down, straight into the well's dirty water. Sadly not the good kind, but the pestilent kind: fetid liquid teeming with sickly rodents, oryx skulls and numerous bloated toads.

Petey then loudly growled and said: "Arrrrrrrrrrrrrr m'hearties, it hurtssss." He felt melancholy over and again. The gods responded promptly to Petey's dark soul,"Your hatred must tame the violent north winds, icy plains full of green goats will not save you. The gale will crush the village, until finally the winds subside. Fear the consequences unless you act wisely. Petey replied, boisterously and with great eloquence, "Me ain't gunna do nuthin' 'bout that , so yous' Hatin be pointless, yo".

Belly-dancing beauties descended from the stormy creche of interstellar infants. Big Afro Joseph sighed, "Aw man! Da hell with this!" As he spouted those grey trolls. Suddenly there was a heavy rain falling from the ground up. "WHAT! RAIN? WHY?" He opined, his eyes aimed at the sky. "Have the ancestors forsaken us? Why do they let the wrath of Petey Pirrrate punish me?" Joseph fell over and landed on the wet grass. His head was hammering. "Who would do such a maleficent deed?" Only the wind answered: "In your mind, kiddo. In your mind." Unfortunately, Joseph wasn't ready to believe whispers by treacherous air spirits.

Meanwhile, Vándr only laughed as she threw the last of the puny villagers off a cliff, knowing that humans could bring the earth to it's knees if they kept eating the many winged lemmings. She was rather pleased, knowing that it was the final fight against the gaurdian that would forever set Vándr's course toward the death of all mortals. "Petey will show the foolish humans that he truly is above humanity's poor souls." She said, looking down on the old little lady's remains. "I, Vándr, will have the last laugh. Truly, the gods don't know how to handle such incredible power."

Suddenly, a surge of enormous power came from the lower level of Manheimr's core, destroying the veil between toon world and the

[Mudfly]

realm of

[Troll]

the sketchy

[Guðmundr]

and capricious

[kincajou]

Bjorn the

[Troll]

bear herder.

[Guðmundr]

Bjorn was

[Guðmundr]

very surprised

(Is double-posting okay if no one else has posted in a while?)

[Troll]

to see
(of course not, it's insta ban for you :))

[Mudfly]

that the
(double posting is always ok ;) )

[Guðmundr]

bears were

[Troll]

as red

[Troll]

as the

[Troll]

blood of
(here I even tiple posted for you not to feel alone)

[Guðmundr]

humans. He

[kincajou]

sought eagerly

[Mudfly]

to get

[Troll]

his new

[Guðmundr]

So far:

As the village slept, dark deeds were planned by bandits. Good intentions, ruthless methods involving fire, silent footsteps, sharp knives. Death ensued. Dawn approached, but the wily varl slashed away the mighty chief of the haughty and obscene--but distinguished--Red Carpet Dapper clan, laughing as he jumped headlong into mighty dreams about liquorice, which he bathed into for Zardoz.

The villagers, profoundly upset by the defenestration of already blind wooden-legged Petey Pirrrate who thennnn grew wings and promptly escaped prison but discovered that he was the son of Red Beard's second cousin, and thus it all came tumbling down, straight into the well's dirty water. Sadly not the good kind, but the pestilent kind: fetid liquid teeming with sickly rodents, oryx skulls and numerous bloated toads.

Petey then loudly growled and said: "Arrrrrrrrrrrrrr m'hearties, it hurtssss." He felt melancholy over and again. The gods responded promptly to Petey's dark soul,"Your hatred must tame the violent north winds, icy plains full of green goats will not save you. The gale will crush the village, until finally the winds subside. Fear the consequences unless you act wisely. Petey replied, boisterously and with great eloquence, "Me ain't gunna do nuthin' 'bout that , so yous' Hatin be pointless, yo".

Belly-dancing beauties descended from the stormy creche of interstellar infants. Big Afro Joseph sighed, "Aw man! Da hell with this!" As he spouted those grey trolls. Suddenly there was a heavy rain falling from the ground up. "WHAT! RAIN? WHY?" He opined, his eyes aimed at the sky. "Have the ancestors forsaken us? Why do they let the wrath of Petey Pirrrate punish me?" Joseph fell over and landed on the wet grass. His head was hammering. "Who would do such a maleficent deed?" Only the wind answered: "In your mind, kiddo. In your mind." Unfortunately, Joseph wasn't ready to believe whispers by treacherous air spirits.

Meanwhile, Vándr only laughed as she threw the last of the puny villagers off a cliff, knowing that humans could bring the earth to it's knees if they kept eating the many winged lemmings. She was rather pleased, knowing that it was the final fight against the gaurdian that would forever set Vándr's course toward the death of all mortals. "Petey will show the foolish humans that he truly is above humanity's poor souls." She said, looking down on the old little lady's remains. "I, Vándr, will have the last laugh. Truly, the gods don't know how to handle such incredible power."

Suddenly, a surge of enormous power came from the lower level of Manheimr's core, destroying the veil between toon world and the realm of the sketchy and capricious Bjorn the bear herder. Bjorn was very surprised to see that the bears were as red as the blood of humans. He sought eagerly to get his new axe sharpened,

[Mudfly]

though he

[kincajou]

knew not

[Guðmundr]

which way

[Troll]

to go.

[Mudfly]

He looked

[Guðmundr]

around for

[Guðmundr]

a sign,

[Mudfly]

where could